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An open letter to my daughter’s bullies

Hope Rises was contacted by mother, Pam Gurley, who was deeply saddened to learn that her young daughter is the victim of relentless bullying at school.

This is the letter she wanted us to publish, hoping that the bullies would read this with their parents and realize how their daily words and actions impact her daughter, Trinity. 

Read on.


“To my daughter’s bullies, why can’t you see what I see when I look at her? How can you look past her sparkling eyes and fill them with tears? How can you intentionally wipe away her warm smile with hurtful words and actions? How can you hear the joy in her voice and turn it to sorrow?

These questions fill my mind when I lay down at night knowing that my daughter will have to go to school tomorrow and face you all over again.

To those who took my daughter’s lunch and snack, just to toss them around and tease her, did you know that for her 5th birthday, Trinity sacrificed her birthday gifts and asked for money, so she could donate to children who couldn’t afford to eat? Did you know she collected over $100 that birthday and every penny went to a children’s foundation dealing with hunger? Did you know that she would have shared her lunch with you and told you all about how thankful she is to have you near her?

To the one who told the class that my daughter had lice and nobody should sit next to her, did you know that she has been growing her hair out for years because it makes her feel like a princess? Did you know her long, beautiful locks that you make fun of are a symbol of her patience? Did you know that this is the same patience she has with you when you tease her and she sits quietly in her seat and focuses on her work, instead of resorting to name calling and fighting back?

Did you know if she saw you sitting alone, she would come sit beside you and be your friend?

To the boy who told my daughter to die, did you know her father and I have already watched her fight for her life? Did you know the day she was born we thought she would never see 10 years old and we watched her fight for weeks to live? Did you know that she had so many people praying for her and fighting with her, hoping that God would help her? Did you know that the doctors told us that she was a miracle baby?

To these bullies – How can you fail to see how truly special my daughter is?

Have you even given her the chance to show you that even though you find so many flaws in her, she is perfectly created in God’s image, just as you are?

Did you know that my daughter forgives you? Did you know she genuinely cares about you and wants to be your friend, despite the past?

To those who have hurt my daughter, did you know that one day you may be lucky enough to have a daughter, too? Despite anything you have said or done to my daughter, I hope your daughter never has to face what you have put her through.

I hope and pray that you will never have to hold your daughter and reassure her that she is worthy of life, love, and peace, when someone else tells her she is not. I hope you never have to look into your daughter’s eyes and see hurt…hurt that cannot be fixed. However, I hope you are blessed enough to one day have a daughter, like my sweet girl.

To my daughter’s bullies, I hope you never have to feel the pain my sweet girl feels.”

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